On the deck

Got two more deliveries under my belt yesterday, of course not without pain and sweat. The first one went along smoothly but when she had a second degree tear and the resident was watching me repair it it was mortifying. As is when ur down there its hard to tell the tissue apart wat goes to what etc. secondly I'm bad at repairs. And thirdly my skills with a needle and knot tying are poor. Finally I am traumatized from my experience on deck as a first year. Oh and I'm supposed to be a second year! Ha. So after a lot of sweat and an hour later she was finally fixed but even then my approximations were poor.
My last delivery was a woman who said the thing she was most afraid of was going to csection. So sure enough an hour of pushing went by and baby hadn't moved an inch. She started to get worried but we reassured her she was making progress. Then we brought out the bar and did that for a half hour, that didn't make much diff. Then we even got her on all fours hanging off the bed. Nothing. The senior threatened forceps or vacuum. She was back on herback and my some miracle she was crowning! We rolled the car in and got ready to deliver.
Baby's head was just peaking out but still stuck. Lubricant and a hell of a lot of coaching plus threat of episiotomy got that big honking head out. We had thought baby was looking up but turn out she was facing down. I thought I. Was going to break baby's neck off the amount of force I had to put to get that shoulder out. But sure enough we got that baby out with minimal years just a.few bilateral superficial years. And after three hours of standing, coaching and screaming I sure as hell did not want to do the repair. I let the resident do it. I mean at 6 am after being up all night I just couldn't bare to go through that embarrassment yet again.
My legs felt like lead weights when I got home. And I fell right to sleep.